Its not a Poem

Today when I look back..
Look back at the life that I have lived..
Look back at the things that I have did..
Look back at the friends that I have made..
Look back at the foes that came on the way..
Look back at the battles that I have fought..
A feeling of discontent runs through my body and plays with my mind..
It pokes me, bites me and kills me bit by bit, minute by minute..
It forces me to question..
Question my decisions,question my choices,question my voices..

Today When I look at the present..
The feeling is still not better..
The same discontent still surrounds..
The same questions are still so loud..
I search for answers but all in vain..
I search for solutions but without any gain..
I search for happiness but all that I find is pain..
I feel that my life is a maze with only dessert and no rain..

And today as I look into the future..
My mind paints a picture..
a picture so very beautiful..So full of life and colourful..
A picture which I had painted for myself when I first dreamt..
A picture which should have been my past and my present
And a picture which I know would NEVER be my future..

You

When the world around me stops..
When my brain gets all clogged up and refuses to work..
When the people around me stop trusting me..
When I look at people around me and just see questions on their faces and then when I reflect upon them and dont find answers..
When I start doubting my own presence..
When I feel that am good for nothing..
When I feel that I have lost everything and none of my efforts can mend things..

It is during these times that I need YOU..
I CRAVE for you..

as I know ;
Its only You who can guide me through..
Its only Your presence which can give me the surety that someone exits who will stand by me no matter what..
Its only Your heart which can understand mine and all the little things in it..
Its only Your touch which can bring me back to life..
Its only Your hug which can set my fears to rest..
Its only Your hands which would never leave mine..
Its only Your ears which would always be open for all the crap that I say and
Its only You who would never judge me for the same..
Its only You who would love the sometimes stupid,sometimes unreasonable,sometimes hopeless, sometimes irritating me..

Since its only You who can make me feel special , pampered , important and LOVED..
I urge YOU to come..