Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Thoughts, one after the other. 
Glued to my mind
Playing with my peace
Some provoking me to act.
Others asking me to stop.
But I stand clueless,helpless

Thoughts, one after the other
Of the past,the present, the future,
Stuck to my mind like a termite
Eating me through and through
Some asking me to to rub off the past
Some asking me to be the architect of my future
But I stand unmoved

Thoughts, one after the other
Of friends and family 
Of that biggest pillar of strength, 
Of that inspiration
Of that guide
Of that mentor
Of that critic
Of that person who means just about everything
Provoked me to speak up and I did
But yet I stand at the same place
and he at the same
But there is a void

Thoughts about my future
Of what I want to be
Of where I would be
Of my efforts not giving results
Have put me in double minds
Have forced me to question my decisions
Yet I have no answer

Thoughts about that special someone
Of just not being able to confess
Of letting it just build in me
Of leaving it to fate
Of keeping myself in the dark
Of living in some moments
Of giving myself hopes that it might happen
Have made me weak & a little irrational
Some say it's ok coz I am in love
The others say I am mad as I am supposed to be rational
But I stand stuck to my belief 

I know the solutions
Solutions to all
But something in me just backs me off
Why is to so difficult to quit?
Why is it so difficult to keep myself before everyone?
Why is to so difficult to just be impulsive at times?
Why is to difficult to take the charge of my own life?

I am not asking for answers as I know what you'll say

I am just venting out everything, hoping the mess will clear!






Sunday, January 2, 2011

indifferent!!

I want to be indifferent,
Indifferent towards people and their attitude
Indifferent towards their useless and good for nothing ego
Indifferent to the selfishness that is stuck to them like an eel
Indifferent to the truths, the lies and the innumerable stories they come up with with
Indifferent to the fact that no matter how much u do people won’t care a shit!
Indifferent to the fact that when ‘by mistake’ they end up doing something for you it is just for their vested interests
Indifferent towards love and all it possible synonyms
Indifferent towards the helplessness that kills me every day!
Is it too much I am asking for??

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Its not a Poem

Today when I look back..
Look back at the life that I have lived..
Look back at the things that I have did..
Look back at the friends that I have made..
Look back at the foes that came on the way..
Look back at the battles that I have fought..
A feeling of discontent runs through my body and plays with my mind..
It pokes me, bites me and kills me bit by bit, minute by minute..
It forces me to question..
Question my decisions,question my choices,question my voices..

Today When I look at the present..
The feeling is still not better..
The same discontent still surrounds..
The same questions are still so loud..
I search for answers but all in vain..
I search for solutions but without any gain..
I search for happiness but all that I find is pain..
I feel that my life is a maze with only dessert and no rain..

And today as I look into the future..
My mind paints a picture..
a picture so very beautiful..So full of life and colourful..
A picture which I had painted for myself when I first dreamt..
A picture which should have been my past and my present
And a picture which I know would NEVER be my future..

Saturday, December 4, 2010

You

When the world around me stops..
When my brain gets all clogged up and refuses to work..
When the people around me stop trusting me..
When I look at people around me and just see questions on their faces and then when I reflect upon them and dont find answers..
When I start doubting my own presence..
When I feel that am good for nothing..
When I feel that I have lost everything and none of my efforts can mend things..

It is during these times that I need YOU..
I CRAVE for you..

as I know ;
Its only You who can guide me through..
Its only Your presence which can give me the surety that someone exits who will stand by me no matter what..
Its only Your heart which can understand mine and all the little things in it..
Its only Your touch which can bring me back to life..
Its only Your hug which can set my fears to rest..
Its only Your hands which would never leave mine..
Its only Your ears which would always be open for all the crap that I say and
Its only You who would never judge me for the same..
Its only You who would love the sometimes stupid,sometimes unreasonable,sometimes hopeless, sometimes irritating me..

Since its only You who can make me feel special , pampered , important and LOVED..
I urge YOU to come..